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    copied!<p>Whether it is best practice or not is a highly debatable topic. For instance, you have to mind the object size limit (currently 4 MB, but will go up soon).</p> <p>as for your question: I suggest that you change </p> <pre><code> embeds_many :replies, :class_name =&gt; 'Message' embedded_in :message, :inverse_of =&gt; :replies </code></pre> <p>to </p> <pre><code> embeds_many :replies, :class_name =&gt; 'Message' referenced_in :message </code></pre> <p>And you will also have to specify both connections manually (that should not be a problem, as they are probably immutable anyway).</p> <pre><code>irb(main):002:0&gt; msg1 = Message.new :subject =&gt; 'new question' =&gt; #&lt;Message _id: 4cc7699f457601d7e8000001, created_at: nil, body: nil, updated_at: nil, subject: "new question", read_at: nil, sender_deleted: false, message_id: nil, recipient_deleted: false&gt; irb(main):003:0&gt; msg2 = Message.new :subject =&gt; 'first comment' =&gt; #&lt;Message _id: 4cc769b6457601d7e8000002, created_at: nil, body: nil, updated_at: nil, subject: "first comment", read_at: nil, sender_deleted: false, message_id: nil, recipient_deleted: false&gt; irb(main):005:0&gt; msg2.message = msg1 =&gt; #&lt;Message _id: 4cc7699f457601d7e8000001, created_at: nil, body: nil, updated_at: nil, subject: "new question", read_at: nil, sender_deleted: false, message_id: nil, recipient_deleted: false&gt; irb(main):007:0&gt; msg1.replies &lt;&lt; msg2 =&gt; [#&lt;Message _id: 4cc769b6457601d7e8000002, created_at: nil, body: nil, updated_at: nil, subject: "first comment", read_at: nil, sender_deleted: false, message_id: BSON::ObjectId('4cc7699f457601d7e8000001'), recipient_deleted: false&gt;] irb(main):008:0&gt; msg1.save =&gt; true </code></pre>
 

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